Daddy issues :/

Hallo!

Another blog entry...it's not even Christmas ;D

Sooo, what's being going on? Well, I am STILL waiting to get this damn flat. I've obviously outstayed my welcome and my fathers as he's said. Giving me deposit money for a place and basically saying, 'go' kinda gives me the impression he's had enough.
Why should I think he'd be okay with his daughter stopping with him when she's homeless? I've been here just a little over 2 weeks and he's fed up of me? I'm not that surprised, I mean, he wasn't there for 16 years of my life so why would he be here now? Why break a habit of a lifetime? Yet he can quite happily be baking cupcakes with his partners daughter as he is doing now. Hmmmm, yeah.

Ah well, sooner I get the fucking hell out of here the better as I can feel the molten lava racing through my chest, wanting to just explode in the way of a fiery tongue-lashing and vile words. I'm trying to hold the rage in, I really am. It's very difficult.

Take Monday morning. I had little to no sleep Sunday night as I spasmed badly all through the night time. Finally getting to sleep I am then awoken by my fathers face around the door informing me I have to 'get up and clean your grandads house. I'll be back in an hour. Be ready.' Said like a threat aswell. I mean, 6am?! So at 7am I am up, washed and dressed, absolutely exhausted and wanting to cry. He drops he at Grandads where I clean SOLIDLY for 4 hours.

I then go to Sarah's to wait for the guy to see me about the flat. I get a phone call from Jo's silly little daughter who is at school asking if I'll be home for her brother. Am I the mother? No. I say I won't be as I'm going to sort the flat out, I tell her to give her brother the keys so he can get in and she says she will. So, problem solved. Later on, phone call again, which I ignore as I am not her minder. Then I receive a text saying, 'What ever happens tell ---- i'm in school i'll explain tomorrow but i'm helping out some teacher's for the last few lessons :) xx'
What in the hell? So I ring my father and tell him that something weird is going on, he doesn't give a shit because the kids 'aren't his problem,' well...there's a surprise!

I don't get to see the flat as the guy is too busy to show me, bummer :( so I trot back to my Grandads to get a lift from my father back to Jo's, Grandads dirty washing it tow. I take the long way to my Grandads and sit by the river for a little while to think. I was indeed tempted to submerge myself in her chilly depths. The feeling was quite strong and before I could do anything stupid I stood up and carried on walking.

On arriving at Jo's place we notice her daughter, the one I mention above, walking towards the bridge and she has a smug look on her face as she greets us. I shake my head as I have no idea what is actually going on and I don't care as I am so tired that I crash out for an hour. I wake up and a dinner awaits me as an apology of sorts and I wolf it down as I've not eaten all day. I tidy up the kitchen, front room, etc. and return to my 'room' so I am out of the way. I read my book for a little bit and then I hear 'Where IS she?!' from the front room. I abandon the book and peek my head around the corner. Jo is fuming as her daughter is meant to have been home 2 hours ago. She is 13 years old and it's getting dark. Jo and her son take off in one direction and I take off in another, jogging to the cinema, Asda, the underpass, the quarry, all over the place. I get a call about 30 minutes later to come back as she has been found. I start jogging back, my feet and calves burning with my effort. I feel good though, I think I'm going to take up jogging again...after investing in a sports bra...ouch!

I arrive back at the house, flushed in the face and breathing like a rapist. She has not only been missing for 2 hours but she also skipped school after lunch! She'd lied to her teacher and said she had a dentists appointment to attend :/ she was checking whether I was in the house or not as she got home and changed her clothes to go up town. Then she met a 16 year old boy...Christ 0_0;

She has entirely too much freedom for her own good! So now there is a lot of shouting and tears. I am asked to kill the kids Facebook account, which she shouldn't have ANYWAY imho because she is just too young! I get really cross at the lax attitude of parents nowadays, grrr! I get a 'thanks' for running about trying to find her and for killing her FB account. So I turn in for the night as I am exhausted.

Today (Tuesday) has been uneventful, thankfully! No phone call from the guy about the flat though, hopefully there will be one tomorrow as I've had enough. I did get another call though, from Shaun :3 it made my entire day! Hopefully I will get to see him this weekend as I do miss him, a lot. I had a fantastic weekend before all of this crap happened on Monday (I still cannot believe that was all ONE day!) and I spent a lot of time with him :) I didn't think I could feel like this about someone, but I do and I am extremely happy.

Right, I'm off to read my book again!

Night all

xx

Woah! I forgot about you-

Mister Blog!

I am a numnuts and never write in you anymore :S my bad >.<

Today I am sat at the keyboard in my Sheepeh PJs and pondering about things pondersome. I have eaten a large bowl of cocopops to assuage my hunger, but it has done little to fill my cavernous maw :'( so I may do an Oliver Twist and have some MORE!!

I have been gardening and walking and jogging and ALL SORTS of things since I last spoke to you Mister Blog! I know you don't really care as you are just a web-based programme but I do feel like I should stop by and just tell you what's being doing on:

• Mum has cut down on her ciggys as she has COPD, she is also struggling to live because my father (*cunt*) has decided to go AWOL and not pay back-dated child maintenance and stuff-he has racked up a huge £2000.00 in money that he owes here. That is a big I.O.U
• Father dearest still owes me redundancy money and other cash, about £800.00 owed
  
• Mum and Rae are coming here to live so I am arranging a house swap with them-oooh! I feel like them lot on t'telly :)
• I have STILL not been able to find a job, regardless of what position I apply for-but then there are about 80 people going for the same bloody job around here :S
• Smokey was Spayed, no I didn't hit her over the head with a garden implement-silly! So she is now feeling 100% better and has stopped 'calling' and acting distressed.
• We have been having a 'girls night' on Mondays and it's great! Really brightens a shitty start to the week up :)
• Rae went into hospital and had an operation on her womb, hopefully she'll be okay as she needs to go back for a check-up yet to find out what the biopsy has shown.
• My knee-caps are seizing quite badly recently, regardless of the walking I am doing. 7 or so years before they should be replaced, if we are going on what Dr.Maxton said :S so there goes my mobility...hoo-fucking-rah!
• The cats are driving me MENTAL! But in a good way
• I am also promoting a 'forum' that I am on-decent people please apply ;) it's just a general place to come and have a natter about stuff and also to exchange talk on games etc. Here is the linkage for you: http://www.sotalkaboutgames.com/forum/index.php I am under the handle of 'Shin,' a joke/name some of you may know about ;) we also have 'GAME NIGHT' on TUESDAY and POKER!
  
• Alex and Allen have had a baby! Who would have thunk it?! I would never have believed Allen to have a baby, obviosul HE didn't but...oh, you know what I mean!
• I dressed up as a scurvy pirate-YARGH-for Red nose day :) it was great fun! Pics soon.
• I have had many birthdays to attend this month, it's been a stretch on the owd purse strings I can tell you!
• Gaz got a raise *fnarr!* NOT that kind, you filthy things ;)
• I have been mainly drunk

IN OTHER NEWS-MY HIGHLIGHTS THIS WEEK ARE:

Poor David Jason, who we used to love as Del Boy and also Frost has been labelled as a 'racist,'
He told an "off colour" joke on Absolute
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7965058.stm


Sorry, don't find that offensive-plenty of Englishman and Irishman jokes like that normally around Guiness or stuff like that and playing on names. Really annoys me all that 'ZOMG RACIST' shit-remember kids, you are only racist if you are white *rolls eyes* whatever.

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I have also recently been reading about 'war dogs' and 'war horses' and it has made me all teary-eyed (this is going somewhere, I promise) and they put the names of the dogs up on the memorial stone and they had one called 'Nig,' now remember this is YEARS ago and people are moaning recently about it-uhhh, it's his NAME and they weren't going to not include him on the rememberance thing because of that so shut up! People go sooo PC at things and it really isn't needed half of the time, it's just stupid.

More info about what I have been reading/learning:

I was inspired by looking at LOLdogs and I was reading some of the comments on http://ihasahotdog.com/2009/03/10/funny-dog-pictures-vet-honored picture as I wanted to know more about it. I then learnt about the 'Battle of Guam' and the dogs that were used to help search for mines and enemies and such like.

There's a lot of stupid comments and daft arguements, but I was just reading all the info being posted about it all and what happened in that war. It's really nice that the memorial was made for the dogs that died in 'service' aswell and not just the humans that were out there.

I also came across http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smoky_(dog) (c. 1943 – 21 February 1957), a Yorkshire Terrier, who was a famous war dog who served in World War II. She weighed only four pounds and stood seven inches tall. Smoky is credited with beginning a renewal of interest in the once obscure Yorkshire Terrier breed.

I am a massive gayer and was quite soppy reading all of this

It just hits home how clever animals really are.

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Led+Sheep+Spare time=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDAM5lSPCwk
FANTASTICO! Check out the vid!!
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This made me laugh: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/5041848/Teenager-paints-60ft-phallus-on-roof-of-family-home.html Kids today, eh?

Nice the parents found it amusing :)