The morning after...

13:13pm

I know it says 'morning' in the post, technically it FEELS like morning to me. Here's what I got up to last night:

Before I even got out I had 3 Carlings at home, yummy yum yum! I had the sudden urge for them, I haven't had that for a couple of weeks now and it's been weird :s

I then went out to the Franwell Beer Fest thing and enjoyed some nice wine! Strawberry and Raspberry or something, VERY nice! The only complaint I had about it was the fact that it wasn't quite chilled enough. I had 3 glasses of that

I MUST get some glasses (eye version.) I couldn't see Jo or Si when I went to the Wheat Sheaf and was whizzing round desperately trying to search for them as there were a few weirdo's there. I saw Nigel Bevan (not one of the weirdo's I swear!hehe) and was embaressed when he introduced me as 'The Lady that does our CAMRA stuff,' I have a dozen eyes on me, some semi-bloodshot due to excessive Ale, Ack! I tried to make a joke of, 'I'm only her if the garments were right, any problems and I'm not her 'kay?' which went down a storm...or not...lol!

I found Jo and Simon after, he's extremely 'with it' recently because of his mask (earlier blog) and was buzzing round the place...speaking of buzzing! There was one of Si's friends there and they call him the 'Wasp man,' or something like that, and he wants me to do *1* shirt saying 'Give bee's a chance' or something because of the imminent loss of bee's in the world. Now, I don't MIND bee's so much but he loves wasps's aswell and I fucking hate them! Ever since mum dressed me in a pretty yellow dress (I HATE dresses!) when I was 5 or something and they chased me all down the park! I cried all the way round the damned theme park :( so I was reluctant to engage in a conversation about my most hated insects.

So we stay there for a little bit, Jo informs me that I have attracted the attention of 3 men...well, 2 men and 1 boy (19?) but I'm not really interested tonight. I have bigger fish to fry :) so we leave and then venture on....

We moved onto the 'Anchor,' which apparently is a very lesbian-orientated pub, I didn't really see any of them, but apparently my 'gaydar' wasn't working properly. I had a few smirnoffs there, saw Phil and promptly sat down outside on a stool next to him (he's one of granddad's friends) and introduced myself to his friends that were with him aswell, as you do! I can't remember what we were chatting about, some random shit. I moved from them to go back into the pub, struck up a conversation with the gent managing the 'real ale' bar thing just to the side of the normal bar. Tattoo's featured largely in the conversation as he had quite a few and I was showing mine off to him, as you do. Then I pop to the toilet to make a call and go pee, I have broken the 'golden seal' and will now want a wee ALL night!!

I go pee, make my call to a certain someone (grins) and then wash my hands, then, as I'm doing so, a lesbian messes my hair up saying 'I looove your hair! It looks soooo cool messed up'...she was *so* lucky that I was in a good mood and didn't decide to 'mess' her rug-munching face up! No-one touches my hair >:( especially not some overweight, rugby top wearing bison! I go back into the main pub area, listen to the band a little bit (they were passable) and then get groped by a man, I rapidly decided I could either:

A, Ignore him and pretend it didn't happen
B, Grope him back
C, Put the heel of my palm into his jaw and crack it
D, Get another drink after saying loudly, 'touch me again and you'll be wearing that pint'

I opt for D! I am in a good mood after all. Normally either B or C would apply, depending on the physical appearance of 'le groper.' I have 1 more smirnoff before ambling down the road to visit a certain someone....and that's where this log insert ends! hehe.

I got back home at aboooout 12:30 TODAY (19th) ? I'm not too sure of the time exactly, needless to say I am very tired, but very happy.

Also, get this song onto your music making machine! It's ACE! I get all 'tingly' listening to it :)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZyaXOOh6Mz0
Gotta love a bit of DP! (Pun also...intended)

Right, I'm going for a little 'cat-nap' on the sofa as I have to be up and ready for Jo to come and then we're off out to lunch,

Ta ra!

*~Kat~*

The things that make me pee myself

OK-or K'O as my mother says:

Here is the list as promised, these are my (sometimes irrational) fears! They also have a 'fear level' by them, see 'key' below,hehe.

• 'IT' from Stephen King ****
• Clowns in general ****
• Old china dolls with those 'eyes' ***
• E.T-Extra terrestrial *****
• Spiders ****
• People dressed as animals ***
• Children! *
• Children with 'jammy' hands/sticky hands ***
• Barney the purple dinosaur ****
• Moths ***
• Bear in the big blue house *****
• Light-bulbs ***
• Changing Light-bulbs *****
• Chavs **
• Pigeons ***
• Dogs ***
• Heights (varies with the level of height faced with) ***/****
• Nails down chalk board ***
• Forks scraping plate ***
• People spitting *
• People chewing gum whilst talking *
• Bellybuttons **
• Darth Vader on Tv ***
• Darth Vader costume ****
• Darth Vader 'breathing' *****
• Nathan Mole (stretton) ****
• PS2 breaking down *****
  
  
  'Fear-o-meter!'
  
  ***** I cannot run, I have paralysis from fear...and also wet pants... MELT DOWN! X( SCREAM!
  **** Oh god, please make it go away! It's making my uterus clench! Save me!! Start to scream
  *** Starting to sweat now, if I'm with someone I can cope with this-but need to leave ASAP
  ** This creeps me out a little bit, but if I ignore it, it'll go away!
  * I can cope with this, I can be in the same room and not sweat. More 'irritating' than scary
  

Do NOT disturb my lunch break!!

13:05

I am having a very annoying lunch break!!

Every time I try and have a bit of fucking peace I get someone asking me something!! Do I *have* to do it now? When this is the only bit of respite I actually get throughout the day? Oh I'm *so* sorry, your obviously extremely busy and *need* me to do this-not the fact you like to try and make me all hot and bothered and rush round...*I* never rush ANYWHERE (well, except the bathroom or the pub maybe...anyway I digress!)...well then...since it won't wait (it would have done!) so I will drag my lunch break out just to annoy you, you stupid cow!

Mind you, I realise now that it is a fellow 'Aquarian' that has come in for the artwork, so this soothes my mood slightly. He wants me to create something nifty within a logo, and me, being the eccentric Aquarian that I am, shall endeavor to make it superlative! It's called 'Aquarius Window Cleaning Services LTD.' Methinks I could have some fun with this! Yayeth!!

Right...I'm going to start a NEW post that contains 'things that I am scared of,' I said I'd do it and haven't gotten round to starting it yet (it is rather lengthy!) and since I have *ahem* extra lunch time, I can do it now!!

My life in numbers...well...hours more like

10:33am

It's been an interesting morning...here's how it panned out...

1:45am-Obhi rings me (information on this at the bottom of page*)
2:15am-Obhi rings me
2:30am-Obhi texts me
2:45am-Obhi rings me
3:30am-Obhi texts me

I manage to get to sleep shortly after

8:00am-Jo texts me and tells me to get my arse to the car park for 9:00am...yeah sure...no problem

8:30am-I wake up! I went back to bloody sleep again! I blame this ALL on Obhi as I was waking up constantly through the wee hours of the morning! I cannot turn my phone off/on silent in case there is a family crisis! And as families go, mine has it's fair share of crisis's.

8:55am-I manage to text Jo some shit about the cat throwing up and me having to clean it, so this buys me 10 minutes (cat sick does not take this long to clean up usually I add!)

9:00am-I trip over Bandit as I rush towards the door and head butt the wall...he ALWAYS decides to 'wind' through my legs in the morning like some stupid fucking may-pole thing, minus the ribbons.

9:07am-I am in the car and conversation is somewhat lacking...

Not that I really want to talk to her as she talks non-stop about my father and their relationship...pah...love, seriously? Simon will be back on form in NO time and he'll be chasing everything with 2 tits and a pulse...OTHER than her. He moans about her constantly saying she's a fat cow e.t.c, which drives me mad! I don't want to fucking know alright!? I don't care if you two feed each other to death! This is actually what is happening as she weighs like 16st and he weighs 21st! He could give that guy/woman/mutant from the 'man gives birth' story a run for his/her/it's money! I just want to make sure they don't get married, do NOT have children and he gets his will sorted asap. If she even THINKS about getting pregnant there will be a bottle of vodka and an extremely hot bath waiting for her, don't think I won't do it!

She has 2 children of her own, spoilt little brats. They had more in a week then me and my sister had in a LIFETIME! Seriously, we had little food, not much heating or electric e.t.c, people think they have it bad...the shit we went through. Then Nan got sick, then mum got sick, then I got sick...and then life decided to get shit.

Okay...enough of the 'Uber Emo' crap! I'd better get on and do this invoice for these wankers as they request it to be typed rather than written...oh joy! Plus I MUST cut my nails as they are hindering my typing, and I need to go as fast as fuck!

ENJOY!

PEACE AND CHICKEN GREASE!!


Kat


*Obhi= The man from the Indian restaurant opposite! He has my number and keep ringing me! He says things like (cover you eyes NOW if your of a mild disposition) 'I'm going to f*$& you up the arse you dirty sexy bitch' e.t.c e.t.c, which I find to be unappealing as offers go. I will go down on Monday (as he's on holiday at the moment) to the restaurant and pan his face in!

Late Night Postage!

23:05pm

Boooyah!

Just went for a manic drive with Sophie! She neglected to tell me she had NOT drivin in her car yet! I nearly pee'd my pants when I found out that fact!lol.

We went to see Madeley-face (Rich) and I giv'd 'im a 'ug! :D Because he's feeling down bless him, I'll try and cheer him up by letting him kick my ass at 'Need For Speed', that's the sort of friend I am! I will risk being ridiculed hugely just to make him smile. NO sparring though! I got bruised badly last time and looked liked a beaten wife!! Plus he stuck his crotch in my face in an impressive 'pin move' on the floor...I didn't tap out too soon ;D

We then went to Oswestry and did 80mph, I had bought 2 new CD's and they were very 'road worthy' one's, proper travelling tunes!! Yay

So it's late at night and I can't sleep again. Bandit, my 1yr 3months old kitten is attacking the wall behind me as I'm writing this on my laptop in bed. I swear he was dropped on his head at birth, he's fucking mental! Smokey, my british blue is curled up at my side and Sooty, Bombay cross, is in the window perving on the neighbour....speaking of which:

Is it wrong to purposefully seek out a pair of binoculars to spy at your neighbour opposite? I caught him having a 'hand shake' the other day....I think maybe....just maybe....I'm losing my mind.

Anyway! If you wanna catch me on facebook then I'm under Katania Jane Caslin Seymour, I'm the only one of my kind so you'll ...sure have no trouble spotting me! Plus my status changes every 3 seconds...sure that's some kind of record...

Right, well...I'd better go to sleep-friday tomorrow! This means I get to go and annoy people in the Swan at Frankwell

ENJOY!

Peace and Chicken Grease!

*~Katania~*

Oh pissing hell!

13:15pm


Oh pissing hell! (*Stomps feet*) why can someone who seems so intellectually sound be so...well...dumb?! Ye gods!People will have NO idea who I am talking about, but I do need to vent!(*Rubs temples*) Where to start?? Well, this year has been pretty eventful already! At the beginning of December 07, me and my partner went our separate ways (more my doing than his) as things weren't really working. It was amusing to find that he had a new girlfriend pretty much straight after our split, no grieving time? Ah well, I was pretty cruel with the separation, but I do assure you that he deserved it (not going into detail, cannot be arsed) so that was a bit of a blow then. But I went and got myself 'involved' with someone in January-not relationship-wise, just sex I think.

Although I had fancied him for a few years on and off, he was a prick though and went with my 'supposed' friend Christina, yes that fat belter. I am entitled to say that as I am cross today, she is a fat belter anyway, great huge arse on her. (Remembers the 'National Express song') 'her arse was the size of a small countrrrrrryyyyyy!' and so that was over....Anywaaay-I turned 22 in January (good 'owd Aquarius!) and had Sophie come to live with me for a few months as she had a row with her family. That was nice, although I do like my own space, she moved out a couple of months ago I think now...not too sure-I'll consult my diary when I get home.

Also, I'm pretty damn sure I am going to turn asexual, like a potato! Sex is too much frigging hassle, this is ME saying that I do appreciate, but seriously! And I hate that 'getting to know you' stage shite. And then you find out your actually nothing alike and that they annoy you, blah blah blah-relationships are overrated!I'll just stick with 'Charlie' I think! A hell of a lot safer, and no babies :p not that I can have the little fuckers anyway, OR want them!

A lot of nonsence about knickers...

Thursday (nearly Friday!)

10:10am
Right okay!
I finally GET to work at 9:30am and there's only Si here....this means I have to talk to him, which I try and avoid as he does irritate me sometimes with his prattle. Sadly, it's very hard to ignore your father-he managed to ignore me and my sister after mum threw him out all those years ago, so I'm kinda pissed I can't do the same! Guess I'm just not as ignorant.
Had to get mum to call a Taxi, she lives in Devon and I live in Shrewsbury, I had to use that 0800 REVERSE (does the annoying voice) shitty thing which drives me nucking futs! The woman ALWAYS says, 'Because you are new to this service...' I am NOT new to the services you stupid automated dickwit! I have used you before! Surely this is an American invention! Dumbasses...so anyway, mum booked the taxi, bless her! She got all confused when they rang her back to announce they were outside mine though and I had to explain that's what they do.
So I'm at work now, Simon has got his breathing apparatus at home...well 'Jo's,' (grimaces) as he has 'sleep apnea,' I told him MONTHS before he actually went to the doctor's that he had it, but no! Would he listen? Would anyone listen? I am a genius when it comes to health issues as I probably have them/or have had them! I'm like a walking medical dictionary...or a walking disaster! I think the latter should be a tattoo somewhere on my person, not sure where though.
'The Corruptor,' now I want that tattoo'ed somewhere! On my knicker line would be quite funny, although it's been a while since I actually wore something resembling 'knickers' really.
I realise I have digressed!! And in a BLOG where I cannot really digress!! Ack! My goldfish brain, damn you to hell! Any-hoof, Simon has sleep apnea (which I told him he had, yadda yadda) and he now has this Darth Vader-esque mask to go on his face at night! (Shivers and starts to sweat) Now, those of you that know me well will know that I HATE Darth Vader! He scares the absolute shite out of me! I realise that a lot of you are nodding and also adding, 'Kat...everything scares you!' so what I'm going to do is make a list of the things that scare me! I want to see if anyone's as fuck-um-'different' as me! So that's what the next post will be!
Right, better do some shitting artwork for some shitty customer now, also doing the 'phones' today (I say phone's' but there is actually only one, so that would be singular...but I'll leave it as the plural-because I bloody well want to!)
Peace and Chick Grease!
*~Kat~*
xxx

First Post! Booyah :P

Sub: You cannot sneeze and wee at the same time...
Did you know that? I have been trying to few several weeks now! Yes, WEEKS I said...I am sad, you are right :S but think about it, if someone says 'you can't' d something, you bloody well want to prove them wrong! Unfortunately there are side affects from trying to sneeze and wee at the same time:

You pee a LOT if you are like me and have hay fever :S
You have to try and hold the urge to sneeze until you find a toilet so you can make sure the experiment continues!
You look like a twat when trying to do this in the toilet, I appreciate that people can't *see* you...but it's the principal of the thing!
Every time you go to the toilet when sneezing it sounds like you are snorting coke, I have *no* idea what it sounds like I hasten to add!
People think you are secretly on drugs.

That's about it really, I'll come up with some more!
I'll write more later on as I'm leaving work

Katania/Kat/KrazyKat/ScabbyKat/Shinonbiyoru/Shin/Seymour-Hoof/SMH/Hoofer/Da Scab.
Peace and chicken grease!
xxx